Current mood:

lonely

Why...?
Why is it that the one thing that keeps you sain and alive, is the one thing that kills you everytime? Why is it that the one thing you give your heart and your soul to always ends up dropping one and cracking it? Why do you always feel so alone afterwards? But most of all....why do you always feel like some how it was your fault even when you've done nothing wrong?! Why do I feel so stupid.....? And ya know, it kinda figures that as soon as I realize that I really do trust him...I find out. That's what made me feel the dumbest. I stand up for us, only to find out that I shouldn't have. I feel really fucking stupid, and I hate that. Why do I want to tell him i'm sorry? Well...I already know why I wan to tell him that...I want to tell him I'm sorry because I feel like i'm not good enough...and because I don't love him the way that I should. I want to tell him i'm sorry for all the thing that I can't give to him to prove to him how much I care...I want to tell him i'm because I feel like next to her, i'm nothing.  I want to tell him that i'm sorry because I really don't know how any of this truly makes me feel, other then ya know, like dirt. I want to run my head threw a wall.....But most of all, I want to know why this happened...and why i feel so alone..